Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Baby on Board!

When I used to see those signs on people's cars I would just roll my eyes. This E Card sums it up...

I saw this months ago and laughed. Sooo true. (see, there really is an E card for everything!)
Now...I know what they are for.
They are an explanation to the driver behind you why you are driving like an asshole in the snow or pouring rain..or just in general.
I took my burrito to the doctor today. His breathing was horrible sounding last night so we slept in the chair together all night next to the humidifier. He was so fussy laying on my chest, not normal for him. So of course I worried.
I knew I'd take him in today, I even set my alarm for 8am so I could call in, but all I could think was..great. It is going to be a horrible day tomorrow and I have to drive my 2 week old child. Considering I have managed to make it all winter without driving in snow..until today, I was a little nervous.
Yup. The roads are shit. If you have to go somewhere...give yourself a LOT of extra time.
Anyways, I had to take the long way out of our subdivision because last winter I took the hill and ended up in the retaining pond. NOT something I wanted to try today. I was stressed out enough. Getting to dr appointments on time...ya beyond stressful.
I probably drove 40 mph? Maybe that is pushing it. Of course I got stuck behind a Ford Focus on PD that was stuck on the smallest hill on PD. Really?? I had to wait forever to get around them because of the traffic coming the other way and all I could think, "Please don't let me get stuck! I have a baby and a dr appointment..." Thankfully my new all wheel drive car rocks and I made it around him.
The way back? Oh Lord. 2 people in the ditch. The second guy, I don't know if he had anyone coming for him, and I would have stopped because there was no one on the roads, but once on board. This mama was focused on getting home safely. Sorry buddy. But ya, seeing 2 cars off roading it makes you grip your steering wheel a little tighter, stare at the road a little harder, and worry a lot more.
So to sum it up...I get the signs. At least if you live in WI. If you live somewhere where it doesn't snow..then its just stupid. ;)
Parker is ok by the way. He just has a super stuffy nose, so his doctor flushed him out and showed me how to do it. The humidifier is going to be on all day.
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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Ohhhh Canada!

Dear Lord...please don't let Parker be sick.

I am now 90% sure that he isn't.

He slept hooooooorrbile last night, which was made worse by the fact that he slept awesome 2 nights ago. Like only waking up 3 times to eat awesome. And then last night.....oh boy. He wouldn't sleep in his bassinet let alone on my chest. #joysofanewborn.

So there was that and then before Thane went to work he says, "Is he breathing really heavy? Like panting?"

I honestly had no idea. How horrible is that? I was so stressed out from not having any sleep and had been more focused on holding him and patting his back to get him to sleep- I hadn't noticed if he was breathing funny.

Well, since he said that I noticed it big time. I got up to change his diaper and listened to him scream. (This kid HATES being naked, let's hope that continues until he gets married.) He sounded wheezy and stuffy. Great. My 2.5 week year old has a cold. NOT cool.

I call my mom crying. I cried? I know...crazy. Between the no sleep thing and the thought of having to take him to the doctor because he was sick already- I couldn't handle it. Him being sick so little is my biggest fear. My mom claims that newborns can't get sick....and dear Baby Gods I hope she is right.

I get off the phone with her, promising I'll call her when we wake up from our nap and just stare at him.

Then...he starts his sneezing fit. He has those. They are hilarious. He sneezes continuously...the most so far is five. Newborns sneezing = cute stuff.

Then it happens.

Canada comes out of his nose.

No lie.

And weird...he can breath again....and sleep. THANK GOD.

So now, I am still listening for his wheezy breaths, but so far nothing. I really hope it was just Canada that was blocking his breathing.

Yes friends. This is the second blog about gross baby stuff. Poop and now Canada? Welcome to my new life. :) I don't even care that some of you may be thinking, "Really Pam? This is what you blog about now?" Cause ya know baby isn't sick!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

I could have blogged about what was on The View today. So consider yourself lucky? (By the way, Schmitt from New Gril was on. LOOOVE!)

Pinterest Find:

Since sitting beside Thane on the weekends doing nothing but holding Parker and watch TV is how we roll now....this is pretty perfect. :)

Monday, January 28, 2013

Let's Make a Deal..

Ok, so this post officially makes me a mom.

It's about poop.

So yesterday morning, Parker wakes up at 6:30, and I did NOT want to get out of bed. So I made a deal.

If Thane would get up and change him and get his bottle ready, I would change every diaper until 6pm that night.

Thane took that deal in a heartbeat.

Back story: Our babe doesn't poop every day. So we both new that was the day. It was like a ticking time bomb...

I changed him all day...and I am developing a complex because I swear..I suck at changing his diaper. He pees through the leg hole or something, but only when I change him. UGH.

At one point I catch a whiff..our baby is smelly.

It was 5:50.

I pray its not...but of course, it was.

He just took a poop and probably lost half his body weight.

Really? Really? 10 minutes to spare.

I was SO close.

I think Thane and Parker have it in for me.

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Friday, January 25, 2013

A Gift from the Baby Gods...

is a pacifier.

My god.....what an amazing invention.

Thane and I decided last night to stick to bottle feeding, since the alternative is not going well at all. :/ My goodness, talk about mommy guilt of the year.

I know that many babies are raised on formula, and they are fine, but still. It's so hard to accept that it's not working...and it makes me feel horrible.

So anyways, Parker was having an intense meltdown this morning that started at 2am. My mom has been staying here, so she had him for an hour and a half before I even heard him. I woke up at 3:30 and got up to see if mom wanted help.

She said he had been crying for a while, had eaten a ton, and she was just about to wake me up. So I tried to breast feed him. Which totally tore at in god's name would I make him stop fussing if I stop feeding him like that.

I looked at my mom, and asked her that question. She can try a pacifier?

I thought about it for a minute, and since Thane and I had just decided we were going to bottle feed not 5 hours earlier...I got up and got his pacifier.

I had my mom clean it off quick, and popped it in his mouth......silence.

Holy crap. I'm buying more. I don't want to ever not have one.

Sidenote: I looove how my mom made me think that it was my idea to use the pacifier. I felt all proud of myself as he was sucking away super happy...and then it hit me. My mom totally suggested, but let me make the decision and had me thinking it was my idea. Smart move move. :)

My mom has been here since Wednesday, and I have gotten 2 full nights of sleep. I feel human again.

Thank you mom!!!!!!!

Today Parker is officially 2 weeks old!! (or would be 37 weeks if I still had a bump.)

I'm so glad he's here.

Pinteret Find:

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

You Know You're a New Parent When...

  • You're baby projectile vomits on your chin and chest, and you just laugh in shock.
    • It's even better when this happens at midnight, and you were trying to let your husband sleep, but now you need him to clean up the baby so you can shower. I passed Parker off to Thane and went to rinse off quick, came back and Thane just looks at me, "He got me too. It's in my boxers."
    • So back story: Parker eats every night at 11. No exceptions. It wouldn't matter if he just ate at 10:30....his little body wants food at 11. So last night he woke up at 10:15 we fed him. Thane called me back in the bedroom to see what he was doing. He was taking a breather from drinking and Thane had him sitting up, his fingers were intertwined and he looked like Dr. Evil from Austin Powers. We were laughing, but I was like, "Oh Thane...he is thinking sumthin up..somehow he will get his 11pm feeding in." So I take him to rock him to sleep...throw up ensues...whole ordeal ends around 10:40. I just looked at Thane shocked. He had figured out how to make room in his stomach for his 11pm feeding. ;) (Note...he didn't actually eat at 11. nope. 12:30 for the record.)
  • The most exciting thing to happen in your day is that your baby's umbilical cord falls off.
    • I literally got excited. Now we don't have to worry about folding down his diapers anymore..which is a huge pain when your baby's legs naturally fold up and are totally in your way when trying to change him.
  • You check to make sure your baby is breathing...every 5 minutes.
    • I sometimes mess with his ear while he is napping...just to make his arm flail or hear him make an annoyed noise. In fact, after his first night I went to check on him before I got ready for my day. He didn't move so I panicked and tried again. I don't remember what I did, but finally he moved. I just laughed at myself and was getting something off the bed when Thane got up. I laughed and said, "Babe, is it normal to check you baby to make sure they are still breathing when you wake up in the morning?" As I say it, I'm turning just in time watch Thane try....and then his entire body spasm and Parker didn't move. So Thane freaked out and moved closer to the bassinet to poke him harder, or do whatever I just did. I instantly touched his back and told him I had just watched Parker move,.he was fine. The biggest sigh of relief came out him. So I am guessing it is normal for parent's to freak out and check. :)
  • You sleep with your glasses on your face.
    • This may not be true for everyone...but I have slept with my glasses on since January 11th. I am also propped up on pillows every night and can't move, but it is so much easier. If I need to get out of bed quick, I don't have to bother grasping for my glasses. Chances are if I did have to..they would end up on the floor...under his bassinet.

That's all I got right now..I'm sure there will be more later. :)

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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

"No Thanks Mom...I'm More of an Ass Man..."

If you don't want to hear about boobs....stop reading now.

If you have a huge moral issue with breastfeeding...pick a new issue because really? Really?

If you feel that hearing someone talk about breastfeeding is TMI...then do NOT read this post. I have talked about it so many times to so many people I could care less if I share it with the whole FB world.

So because Parker was 5 weeks early, even though I wanted to feed him myself we had to supplement with a bottle to make sure he was getting enough food for his tiny body.

So first off, in my head this take a lot of stress off of me.

It is stressful to know that all your baby is getting the "fake" milk, and it could take days until they get the real goods. And while he waits he is super hungry.

In reality, mixing a bottle and a boob right from the start...noooot a good idea. The baby classes didn't lie.

Because he is so young, they said he will have problems latching on and I will have to be patient and wait for my milk to come in.

His first feeding went great. When I cried out in pain, the nurse smiled all evil like and said, "Oh good! That was easy." Ya, thanks for the false hope. It's anything but easy!

He only likes my boobs when he decides he wants to like them.

When he doesn't like them he lets me know in a few subtle ways. 
  1. He screams. Bloody murder. If he could talk I'm pretty sure he'd be saying, "Get that damn thing out of my face!!!! I just want that rubber nipple that isn't any work at all!!!! WAAAAA!!!!"
  2. Turns his head away, as if he can't even be bothered to look at my boob, with his mouth hanging open. When he does this, I can't help but laugh. Is he shunning my boob, or is he confused about what he needs to do? He's cute.
  3. Punches my boob. Not joking. He balls up his fist and swings. and I swear..sometimes he smiles.
When he thinks, "Hmm...I think I'll make mom feel good about herself." He literally latches on in less than 5 tries and rocks out.

My son is so stubborn, but I love him anyways. ;)

I fully understand that it is not easy for anyone to breastfeed, and in no way am I being all "woe is me," but it is frustrating. SO frustrating. I know that if it doesn't work, it doesn't work and he will be totally fine drinking formula. I am not hugely passionate either way, but I am going to keep trying. I don't like to give up on things.

I just think its funny how he reacts.

I'm sure he will enjoy reading this post when he is 8. Sorry buddy.

Ok, I need a nap.

These Are The Moments...

First day home alone.
So far so good!!!
We have a play date at noon with Julie and her adooooorable son Ryan. (when I say play date, I mean Julie will hold Parker while Bernie sniffs Ryan. :)
I was feeding him this morning while watching the Today show. I had assumed my rocking had made him fall asleep so when I looked down at him, I realized I was totally wrong.
He had twisted his head to the side, and was staring right at me.
Ohhhhhhh those are the moments ehh?
I cried.
True story, I know its hard to believe.
His eyes are becoming less cloudy, and he was that perfect distance from he was looking at me. Just studying me.
I put him in his swing today. Yaaa me!! (Of course I put blankets under his butt so the angle wasn't much.) He started to fuss and I went over to discover his hat had fallen over his eyes and he couldn't feel the sunshine on his eyes. I moved his hat...and he was good.

I laughed...annnd then teared up.

Thane is so perplexed why I cry all the time. I think its just the Baby Blues and hormones, and as my cousin Linds said, "I just love him so much." It's overwhelming.

K...I have things I have to do while he is sleeping.

Monday, January 21, 2013

First "F" on a Test...

So the next couple of posts are going to be about our time in the hospital. I know I have said it before, but I plan to make a book out of these blogs. I have attempted to write in a journal for Parker, but in the end...I like blogging a lot better. So if your wondering, "why the hell did she write about something so insignificant??" It's cause it was part of our experience and I don't want to forget it.

Sorry for the swear words Parker...don't repeat them.

So, as you already know, our baby burrito came at 35 weeks. On the dot.

If my water had broke 12 hours sooner, there is no doubt he would have been in the NICU. We were told that there was a 50/50 chance that he would be in the NICU or stay with us. It really depended on his vitals when they tore him from my body.

So we got the lucky end of that, and he got to stay with us. Thank god.

He passed his hearing test, with flying colors. I think? I have no idea how they even do that test. Thane was holding him and I was in a sleep/awake coma. All I remember is that I was praying, in my own way, that he passed.

The next test he had was a "car seat" test. Our nurse came and took him to the nursery for a 90 minute test to see if he could use a car seat, or if he would have to use a special car bed from the NICU.

So they wheeled him away, and we settled down for 90 minutes of uninterrupted sleep.

He was back in 15 minutes.

 He failed the test.

Apparently the tests sole purpose is to see is a premature baby is able to breath while in their car seat. Parker's neck is not strong enough to hold his head up even a little bit so he can breath. His oxygen levels were not where they were supposed to be, so they stopped the test.

My response? "Aww man Parker! You're failing tests already!? This is not setting yourself up for a lifetime of learning." ;) Ya, that's the teacher in me.

I am so thankful they do a car seat test. What a horrible surprise if they didn't do it. Oiy. So scary to even think about.

My favorite part of the test was our stupid pediatrician's response to it. (Stupid? you say..ya its a whole different post.)

Her response, "Ya, its so great that they do the test here at Meriter. I have never even heard of it until I got here. In Fort Atkinson they don't do car seat tests, so I'm not sure if it's ok for your baby to use his swing." Really?? Really?? Our nurse, who was also dumb, was the one to say that the swing should be ok because a lot of them have a recline feature. Ugh.

Speaking of a swing, we have an amazing one that Thane's sisters and aunt all went in on. It plays 5 different songs, has a mobile, a puppy ear pillow. Its great. We asked our real pediatrician if it was ok to use even if he failed the car seat test, and he gave us the ok. so we came home and decided to put him in it while we put laundry away.

Ya, he stayed in it for maaaaybe 5 minutes before I had an anxiety attack about it and took him out. I think we will wait a little bit longer so I know he is safe and his neck is ok. :)

So while I am thankful for the car seat test and the car bed, it makes taking Parker anywhere an ordeal.

He had trouble regulating his temperature, due to him being premature. Nothing too serious, but trust me...that post is coming too. So because the bed is buckled into my car already we have to take him out to it and put him in the bed in the garage...not in the warmth of our home. Same deal when we are going in or out of a building.

We have to carry him every where, and if we are outside I have him wrapped in a blanket, while I throw another one over his head. Of course we had to go out today, the coldest day so far this winter.

Here is a picture of the car bed. It's pretty cool.

Pinterest Find:

Dictionary necklaces...find a word that describes the recipient & frame it..

What a cool gift!

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Here He Comes! Ready or Not! Part 4.

 So we left off with me panicking because I was pretty positive they forgot about Thane...

Thankfully, my friend with the good drugs musta realized it because he was all like, "We can bring in dad now...." all like, um guys?
So they went and got my baby daddy and I could relax a bit. My friend with the drugs told Thane he could look anytime he wanted to....gross. He didn't.

I felt absolutely nothing during the entire process. Just a few tugs. The noises though? Oh the noises. Were horrible. The saw....that was the worst. and the sucking. *shudder*

I don't think I have ever held Thane's hand so tightly. Literally for dear life. I just needed Parker out..and safe. I needed to see him and know he was ok. Considering all I have worried about the entire pregnancy is that he will be totally ok (all fingers n toes etc)...I had to see him.
I will never forget the anesthesiologist talking us through it. "Ok, now you're going to feel pressure by your ribs. That is them pushing him down so they can get him out." Barely felt it. Thank sounded horrible.
Then it was, "OH!!! Here comes his butt!" yes, he was *that* excited...and yes he came out butt first. His butt was in my pelvis.

Then.....I heard him cry. So amazing. Soooooo life changing. 

At this point they took him to the warming station, and Thane got to go over. 

Another nurse came in to tell the anesthesiologist that he was needed in another room. He got super annoyed with her and pretty much said, "I'm busy..I'll be there when this is over." The nurse kinda stood there for a minute, and went..."ok.....I'll go prep it myself?" He then said, "Sounds good!" and turned away from her. If I could remember that man's name, I'd send him a thank you card.

So Thane was gone forever, and they started to stitch me up. No one was telling me anything about Parker except that he was healthy. So finally I was like, "Um...he's a boy right?'
Everyone stopped what they were doing, I hope, and busted up. A nurse came around the curtain and laughing told me that he was a boy. To which I said, "Thank god...we don't have a girl's name."

Finally my friend with the drugs whispered, "Here he comes." and my heart stopped. (figuratively not literally..that'd be a WHOLE nother blog post...)

Then Thane came back with him, his eyes totally wide and a big ole grin on his face. He moved so I could see our baby for the first time and he literally took my breath away.

 He was perfect. Totally perfect. Adorable. Mine. I cried....sooo much crying in such little time. :) 

They finally were done stitching up my layers, rolled me onto a different bed, and off we were to recovery. I asked what time it was, and it was like 8:30. Totally pumped, because then I could watch The View. The nurses thought that was funny too. 

We got to recovery, I'm gettin drugs and I look down to the foot of my bed and see my husband.

Head down, gigantic grin on his face, phone in hand, fingers flying. He was texting "everyone in his phone."

I love this man so much.

My favorite part of this room..the drugs button. God it was good.
Then, after almost 2 hours and missing The View, we were off to our room.
Room 592.
The room where Parker met all the important people in his life for the first time.
I don't even have a word for the support and love that we got from everyone. It is beyond there a word for that?
My friends are some of the most amazing people ever, and Parker is SO luck to have them as aunties. It's so awesome to see all of them with my little burrito. If you could ooze love...he'd have that goo all over him.
My family...he couldn't have been born into a more amazing group. They are all so excited about him. I can't wait for Easter so my cousins can meet him. :)

So that is pretty much it! Hope you enjoyed. It went a LOT smoother than I thought it would, that's for sure!! 
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Here He Comes! Ready or Not! Part 3

So what I have forgotten to mention is that apparently its super rare for your water to break. I actually go to see my doctor on the last day we were there and I asked her about it. 

Ya, 3% of women's water actually breaks unexpectedly. Thank god mine did.and Thank god I knew he was breech. This whole story could have been a lot different if I hadn't just started my weekly appointments.

We get into the triage room and the first thing the nurse did was grab an ultrasound machine, to see if he had turned yet. Nope. Not at all. Of course not, he's my son. Stubborn.

I also forgot to mention that he was Franklin Breech. Ya. His legs were up by his this:

Soooo ya. There was no way I wasn't having a C-Section. Even if they had offered to try and turn him...I would have said, "Keep your hands to yourself...they are NOT pushing on him and/or going in my va-ja-ja." Thanks but no.

I was hooked up to an IV. I HATE needles. HATE them. I couldn't watch...and of course the first didn't take, so she had to do my other arm. THEN they had to draw a LOT of blood. a lot. Queeesey.

They hooked up the heart rate monitor and told me I was for sure having a C-Section. Someone was literally pushing her child out as we were speaking, and there were other women waiting to be sliced open as well. Since I wasn't having contractions, and he wasn't in distress, I was not a main priority. Which was fine with me! All I asked is that they give me a heads up when they know the time frame bc otherwise I would freak out if they sprung it on me.

They left us alone then, and I texted a few of his aunties saying, "Um...I'm having my kid today." or something to that effect. Apparently they all thought I was messing with them, until they realized what time of day it was..silly girls, I wouldn't mess with you like that. Besides, I had started to time for jokes.

They came in and told me I'd be having Parker in 3o minutes. Which in reality was like 15. They came back in, had Thane grab our stuff and we walked to the OR.

Yes. I had to WALK. Without underwear. Still had enough sense/modesty to worry that I was going to leak pregnancy goo everywhere. I had to walk..that was the worst part.

We got back to the recovery room, and that is where I had to leave Thane. That was horrible. I was so scared...I really needed him with me. But I understand why he couldn't come.

One this point it was 7 am and it was shift change. Bad- I got an old nurse who I don't feel was totally away yet. Good- I got a new drug guy.,,and I liked him WAY better than the one who had talked to me in the triage room. The new guy didn't have chest hair curling out of his scrubs and didn't crack stupid jokes and then laugh at them. It's like he was posting "funny" status updates and then liking it himself.

Soo we walk back to the OR and my new 80 yr old nurse leads me over to a station so she can scrub up and get a mask. It took her 3 minutes to pick a mask. Then the anesthesiologist came over and was like, "Ok! This room? and started to open the doors to OR 2." The nurse was like, "oh..I don't know. I don't think so?"

Ya...I may have panicked a little bit? Looking back, they had literally just been thrown onto my I'm guessing that little tidbit was overlooked by other important info, but still.

We walked into OR 1 and I freaked out. I have never had surgery before. Ever. The room looked like an alien probing room on the X-Files. I really wanted Thane.

They had me get up on the bed, and the anesthesiologist began his deal, and I began to sob.

I was so scared. I know I sound like a total baby...but I was so nervous. The nurses though, my god they were great. I literally began crying and they came out of the woodwork to talk to me. I think we talked about my job, which since it's with kids everyone had a lot to say. They asked me about the baby. They totally got me through it. I will forever be grateful for that. They were so sweet.

Sooo I stop crying for a bit, my body is going numb, they have to lay me down. Oiy. All I can think is, man..I weighed a lot before he started growing, and now I weigh 31 more pounds....I hope they don't drop me. Of course they didn't, but it wasn't fun.

So now I'm laying down, and they start doing things. Most importantly...they put up the big blue curtain so I can't see. Thank god. Of course, tears start again. But this time the anesthesiologist stepped up. He explained his job, but then kept talking to me about the most random things about my life...totally distracting. Once again...thank you Mr. anesthesiologist. You were my favorite person in that room. For so many reasons.

So anyways, things are moving along. They are about ready to start. Thane still isn't in the room. I'm pretty sure they forgot about him.

Oiy.....soooooooooooooo long!!!

Stay tuned for Part FOUR! 

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Saturday, January 19, 2013

Here He Comes! Ready or Not! Part II

Here we go...

I had Thane throw everything into the car and we were off...into the foggy ass morning.

Thankfully it was like 36* out, because the roads were just covered in water, and I hear that it got colder for the morning commute...and froze. That would have been a whole new basket of stressful.

We were driving in what seemed like slow motion, even though Thane was going 60...not the speed limit but it was pea soup out there people. I just sat in my seat with tears rolling down my face.

He was coming too early.

I wasn't ready.

He was breech....which means one thing- a c-section. The one thing I didn't want.

Thane and I were both surprisingly REALLY calm though.

I always think of The Father of the Bride 2 when the girls go into false labor and Steve Martin tweaks out. Ya...we were nothing like that. Even through my tears, Thane and I had a conversation..about what? Noo clue. Joked around a bit....talked about the Mayhem commercial where he is giving birth. That commercial cracks me up.

I suddenly realize that I could be leaking pregnancy goo all over my new I pulled off my coat to sit on it. That would be so hard and gross to get out of the seats...and then no one would ever want to sit shot gun again. Eww.

I was also more worried about work, than what was about to happen to me. I called Grace to tell her that she needed to go into work at 7am. I didn't want them to be short handed in the morning and she had to do art class on her own that day. I hate calling into work, which I have blogged about before, so I wanted to make sure I wasn't screwing other people over. And this darn peacock project HAD to get done! Thane told me to wait til 5am, but considering it was 4:56..I decided she didn't need that extra 4 minutes of sleep.

The conversation when like this..after almost all the rings- G-"Ugg......heello?" Me:"Grace, you need to go to work at 7 today." G-"Ok." Me: "No, wake up and set your alarm. You need to be to work by 7." G-"Ya....ok." This part of the conversation went on about 4 more times. and then I said thanks and hung up...turned to Thane and laughed, "yaaa....she isn't going to be there by 7." BUT! To her  credit..apparently she made it on time. :) Thanks Grace!!

3 minutes later, I get a text. "WAIT!! Are you having you baby?!?!!?" Oh boy're a quick one at 5am ;)

Then I got all weepy, and turned to Thane, "Can I call my mom?" Which I'm sure did NOT sound like that at all because as I said it I started to cry even harder. So it was probably more, "CanIfdjafdlalkcallmymfdlajfdamom?" Of course he said "yes" so I grabbed my phone.

She answered after one ring. Literally one. She must have been sitting right by the phone. I didn't want to call her in case I wasn't really in labor, becuase at this point I'm pretty sure I was in denial? But the need to talk to my mommy won I'm thankful she she answered.

After a quick pep talk from Grandma Jan, we hung up and I felt a little better?

We get to the hospital and I am so hot I just left my coat in the car. No coat. Tank top. Flip flops. Typical WI girl right?

This is gross:

It is beyond a horrible feeling to have to walk after sitting for 25 minutes when your water has broken. I felt like I was peeing myself every step I took and I still had the sense to worry about if it was leaking down my leg in an embarrassing stain. Ugh.

Thank god I had actually pre-registered, something I hadn't procrastinated on, so we just had to find the triage floor. NOT easy to find someone to ask for directions at 5am. We saw a sign and just walked to it..6th floor. Goods.

We get off the elevator and ya, clearly NOT the right spot, but was there someone at the desk? No..because they were still comfy in their beds.

Luckily someone walked by who could see I was huge...and we looked lost and she pointed us in the right direction. We apparently snuck in the back way? We are pretty sneaky people.

We find a nurse, check in, and get taken to a room right away.

This is where it gets fun...

Stay tuned for Part 3. I'm long winded...

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Considering I call Parker "my little burrito" because when he is in the hospital swaddlers he looks just like one...this is hilarious. I have even made a song up about it to La cucaracha. It goes like this, "Parker Burrito, Parker Burrito, you're such a little burrito. Parker Burrito, Parker Burritoooooo, you're a cute burrito!!" I didn't say it was good....but it made him stop screaming at 2 he likes it. :)

Here He Comes! Ready or Not! Part I

So here we go. Parker's birth story. It's not gross...I promise. part might be?

So all along my mom has been telling me that I will probably get this "burst of energy" right before he is about to come. Some people may think my huge 5 day cleaning spree was it..but I don't feel like that was even close to when he came...sooo I'm not counting it.

Thursday I came home from work. Exhausted. Beyond exhausted. Art days kicked my ass the last month and it was no different that day. I came home and did my best not to nap on the couch.

Thane went to guys night and I snuggled in bed with Bernie trying to make it til 9. As I laid there I thought to myself, "huh...I should really pack that hospital bag. It will take like 10 minutes and then I have done something productive tonight!" I got so far as to uncover myself..buuut then I thought, "Mehh, I'll do it this weekend." and snuggled back into bed.

Thane came home from guy's night and I was finally able to go to sleep.

I woke up at 3:30 and had to pee and was crampy. I tried to ignore that I had to pee, because usually I could. I had only gotten up a handful of times during my pregnancy to go to the bathroom in the night..but this time I couldn't.

So pee.....and go back to bed.

This is where it may get gross? I dunno...

4:30 I wake up and I'm wet. I was super annoyed and got up to go to the bathroom and as I walked...more liquid came out down my leg. My first thought?

I'm 28 years old and I'm literally peeing my pants as I walk to the bathroom...and I'm sober. Wtf?

I literally get to the bathroom and boom.....I pee everywhere. Except, zero on that bodily fluid. I looked at the floor and it looked like I had just spilled water everywhere.

Not good.

I instantly thought I was just leaking fluid, like they ask you EVERY time you have an appointment, so I didn't panic. I sat down on the toilet and just waited for it to stop..aaannnnd it didn't.

I yelled for Thane. Like 3 times, until I get a "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?" to which I responded..."get up..I think my water broke? or something? I have no idea...something is happening."

He got out of bed and came to the door. I didn't even care that I was sitting on the toilet. Something he has NEVER seen me do, because let's be real. You love someone...but you don't want to see them sitting on the toilet.

He asked if he should call in..and then got on the phone.

The nurse wanted to talk to me, so I took the phone and told him to go get a suitcase. I should have packed that damn bag.

The nurse was telling me that she thinks my water broke, and to do prelabor at home. Then I informed her that we had just found out he was breech. She goes, "Ohh...ya well that changes things. Um, so don't break any traffic rules or regulations..buuuut you need to get in here asap."

Done. Enough said.

We threw our bag together, and only forgot about 10 things...took Bernie out...and left.

Did I mention I had yet to feel one contraction? Ya...none.

Ok..this is long. I'll finish in another post. :)

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Thursday, January 17, 2013

The First Night...

We made it through!!!!!

Parker made it....and Thane and I didn't cry. (well I did, but not because of Parker.)

We were beyond ready to come home. 4 nights in the hospital will do that to ya.

Come my bed time I headed to bed...excited to sleep in it after sleeping in a hospital bed, which in all honesty was better than I thought it would be. After I broke down crying from frustration at the extra 4 blankets on the bed that were super heavy, I crawled carefully into bed....and kept crying every time I moved.

I was in SO much pain from my c-section trying to move around to get comfy...finally I couldn't handle it. Couch time for me. :/

So Thane and Parker slept in our room, and Bernie and I bunked it on the couch so I could sleep sitting up.

So far so good!!!

Until I woke up at like 11:30 to Parker screaming in his bedroom.

First off, I was super confused. How the hell did he get in his room? I mean..I know my baby is already advanced for his age, what with his ability to grip my finger so tight I can't get away, and how he is already grabbing Thane's beard, AND he already plays "Got your nose" with me...;) but there is no way he is advanced enough to get out of his bassinet and get to his room.

I finally got up, slowly and painfully, and waddled to his room.

Thane is on the floor with him, slightly resembling a zombie. He just shook his head and told me he couldn't get him to stop crying. Apparently, it had been going on for a while before I woke up...but the love of my life felt bad that I felt like shit, so he didn't want to wake me. :)

Wanting to relieve him, I told him to give me Parker and relax for a bit. As he was scooping him up to hand him off, he looked at me- dead serious- and said, "Careful...he can smell fear."

At the time it totally broke my heart. Thane had tried so hard to not wake me up and take care of our screaming baby to no avail. What a great guy. But makes me laugh my ass off. I love that man.

So anyways, we had no idea what to do. He had just eaten at 9, and everyone had said he only needs to eat every 3 hours. His diaper was clean. What else does he need?!

So I sat in the recliner with him, but as soon as I sat in the leather chair cold literally shot through my body. I figured that it was just the cold chair....but I started to shake uncontrollably and my teeth began to chatter. I told Thane to get me a blanket asap..but I couldn't talk right, so he didn't understand the jumbled words coming out of my mouth. I finally passed Parker back and booked it to the bedroom to crawl in bed. Something that is NOT easy when you are shaking so hard your body won't move.

Thankfully our heating pad was still on high and there were now 4 blankets on our bed, so it was warm in there. So I sat in bed for about 5 minutes, shaking so hard I couldn't talk and crying for some reason.

You think I'd be scared? No...I was more worried about Thane having to deal with the stress of Parker screaming and watching his wife go through whatever the hell was wrong with me. It was not a pretty sight, and I'm sure it was really scary. :/

After I stopped shaking, I took Parker back so Thane could go do something and I just held him against me. Still screaming. He did one of those baby head moves that you aren't ready for and all of a sudden he found my boob.....and it was all over.

I was in shock. This may be TMI because you don't want to hear about my boobs. But he has had problems with latching because he is so young. So the fact that he found my boob and instantly latched on..amazed me. He ate....and life was good again.

Last night he woke up again at 11, about to have the same fit. But this time!!! I figured it out. He was hungry. Screw the schedule...even though he had just eaten like 2 hours ago..this kid was hungry. SO Thane quickly made up his bottles and boom....melt down averted.

I was pretty dang proud of myself. :)

A friend had asked if I was going to blog about Parker's birth story..and I said no. I don't want to share the gross details with you guys. But now that it has happened..and it really wasn't that gross...I guess I will. ;) Stay tuned.

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So true. I look at Parker and I can't believe how much I love him.

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Birth Plan This.

I don't know if this post will be sharing too much, but I thought about it..and I don't care. I plan to make a book out of all the blog posts I have done since we found out we are this one is more for me to remember what happened. :)

Today marked the first of my weekly appointments.

I waddled in just on time. I hate being late. (and yes, apparently I waddle now...)

Anyways, my doctor was feeling below my belly button to see if B Sutts has turned yet. She goes, "hmm...I think he has, but I'm going to go grab out little ultrasound machine and just check."

So she leaves and I start to think about his marathon kicking fest from the other night, and think.."there is no way that was head butting. Those were definite kicks...from his feet."

So she brings the ultrasound thing in, which looked like an ipod, and she puts it under my belly button and says, "and now we should see his head!!.......oooooorrrrrrrr his butt. Ugh." (Ya, I'm pretty sure she made that sound.) Moves it up by my ribs, "Um, yup. There's his head. Weeelllllll....."

Then she proceeds to tell me that if he isn't turned by next week we need to consider that he may be breech.


That is the 2nd thing in my birth plan, right after "have my baby", avoid C-Section at all costs.

Well, apparently this is why birth plans are dumb. You can't even stick to a super simple one!

Needless to say, I have spent the rest of my day pushing on his head to try to get him to move. He has moved from the side of my body to the middle, so maybe there is hope?

I  know I have a lot of time (hopefully) left, and that I really dont need to worry about it til week 37, but let's be real.Until I feel him move, I'm going to be constantly pushing on my belly.

 I may get weird looks. 

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Monday, January 7, 2013

Smart Ass....

So first off, thank you to everyone who came to my Thirty-One open house yesterday! I really appreciate it, even if you just came by to say hi. I like having company. :)

As you may have seen in my status, last night I was laying in bed when I realized I had barely felt B Sutts kick all day. I'm sure he had been kicking, but I was probably just too busy to notice the little ones. If you don't know, it is NOT a good thing if you are this far along and you don't feel your baby kick you. I have already had one freak out this to Thane, who told me to calm down...but its hard to calm down when you know what it could mean.

Anyways, just as I was about to tell Thane and have a minor meltdown, he kicked me. and then kicked me again. and again. and again. Literally every 5 seconds. He has never kicked that much before in one round. So what does that mean?

B Sutts is already a smart ass.

Obviously he takes after his mother. Opps.

I couldn't help but picture one episode of the Simpsons where they show Bart in the womb. So at that moment, my child looked like Bart, spikey hair n all, with his hands behind his head, just kicking and counting. "kick..2,3,4,5. and kick, 2,3,4,5....KICK 2,3,4,5.....SEEEEE MOM!! I'M FIIIIIIIIINE!!!!"

It was pretty cool though because Thane was able to feel him kick finally, which hasn't happened a lot yet.

On to my status today!!!!

Ice Cream Sundae!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy right now. :)

Here's what you're missing...

Ice cream. Oreos. Chocolate Syrup. Whip Cream.